Ora Funky Cat Review in the Style of Shakespeare

I asked ChatGPT to rewrite my review in Shakespeare!

If Shakespeare (Shahzad SheikhSpeare?) – the PlaywrightCarGuy – wrote car reviews, perhaps would they read like this? This is what AI ChatGPT thought when I fed it my existing review – read here – and asked it to rewrite it in a Shakespearean style!

“Ah, Ora of GWM! Thou hast ne’er heard of this brand, I daresay? Nay, ne’er seen it before? Fear not, good sir, ’tis a true chariot, all electric and ready to be thine.

First impressions, thou may ask? Perchance a tiny runabout? Maybe one in the mould of a Fiat small? Nay, ’tis larger, aye, ’bout the same length and width as a Volkswagen Golf. Though compact enough for city scurrying.

And what of its garb? The offspring of a Porsche and a Beetle, born in Shanghai’s night, a sight to see! Its front is charming, its rear a sight to be seen. Its bulk, of a ton and a half, only hinted at in design.

Smart and agile, this pup, with technology and gear aplenty. The bulk is due to its 48kWh Lithium-Ion battery pack, with a range of 193 miles claimed. 170bhp and 250Nm of torque drive the front wheels, reaching 62mph in 8.3 seconds, with a top speed of 99mph.

From Great Wall Motors, a giant unseen, ’tis China’s pride, with five brands, selling near 1.3 million chariots, with a gross of £16.6 billion. Operating in 60 lands, with 59,000 employees and joint ventures with BMW, ’tis no stranger to success.

Ora, launched in China in 2018, is the group’s first electric chariot. Though new to us, the Funky Cat (as it’s known) is a proven mount, with a 5-star Euro NCAP crash rating and a 5-year warranty, with 8 years or 100,000 miles for the battery and service every two years or 18,000 miles. Prices start at £31,995, with showrooms and online purchasing available.

Practical and usable, the Funky Cat is, with a boot and rear lights, a spectacle to behold. The boot is high, with 228 litres of space, expandable to 858 with the rear seats down. Under the floor, the repair kit, tools, and charging cables are kept.

Only one spec, the First Edition, is available, with four colours, with a GT version coming next year. The interior is bright, with quilted leather and toggle switches.

As soon as you enter, you’re watched and listened to, with a camera monitoring the driver. But do not fret, for you can call upon Ora, a charming character on the screen, who answers your questions and does your bidding.

Packed with tech, the Funky Cat has it all, from adaptive cruise control to wireless charging and sat-nav, with 360-degree camera and sensors, ’tis all that you may want.

Apple CarPlay and Android Auto are coming, with an over-the-air update to the system, and an app to stay connected to thy chariot.

Four full-sized adults may travel comfortably, with ample legroom and no issues up front. Driving modes include Eco, Normal, Sport, and one-pedal mode.

In conclusion, ’tis a compact chariot, with surprises aplenty. A wise choice, indeed, for the city-dweller and beyond.”

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